Each year I try to take time to reflect on her life and journey. This year I would like to reflect on some key words and quotes that reflect the 30 day period in which my mother made her transition from this world into the next.
At age 34 I watched my mother died rather quickly and have to endure a tremendous amount of pain. I remember when my family finally got in contact with me (I never keep my cell on and still do not to this day), my heart sunk and I thought: It is finally here. As a teenager I begun to realize that my mother would probably not make it to 60 years old and I was right: she died at 57.
I could have never imagined that I would pray for DEATH but I did. Seeing my mother in traction for three weeks, her body fail her, and watching her vital signs move up and down like a roller coaster was very difficult but it is one that I felt life prepared me for. It strange saying that but its true. Prior to my mother's death I had at least two friends die prematurely-Robert and Milton. Both deaths gave me my first taste that death is real for humans and no one can escape it.
As the days progressed I slowly watched the signs of reaper's presence: skin breakdown, vital signs of the walking dead, not wanting to eat, etc. I continued to wonder does everyone's life have to end in pain. I would hope not but during our transition to our next life this is often the case. Luckily in death we (the living) get a glimpse of heaven. I will talk about that one later!
One quote that comes to mind about the month of October is one I found in a book of quotes by Glenn Van Ekeren: "Well, you see, it's like this. The Bible says often, 'And it came to pass,' never, 'It came to stay."
This quote reminds me that any pain we endure in the end or at anytime in our life only occurs in passing and never stays. This is mantra of my mother's life, one filled with many moments of pain and suffering but they never stayed and in the end she did find her rainbow.
The other is the Poem-Don't Quit by Clinton Howell (http://www.angelfire.com/nt/Yeoh/Quit.html), particularly the first section:
When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low, and the debts are high,
and you want to smile, but you have to sigh.
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.
This is exactly what my mother did most of her life and definitely for the last 30 days of her life. She held on so that we would have time to accept what was coming and have a few more days with her. I have always thought and will continue to think so that my mother endured a lifetime of mental and physical illnesses so that her children may live a healthy life. It is because her and my father that I do not take anything for granted and cherish my good health.
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