Your Story Lives! A Thank You to Mom

Holidays still 8 years out HURT! There is a seat at the table that is no longer filled. You left us shortly before Thanksgiving in 2007. Since then I am reminded of the importance of keeping your story, your legacy alive. You life was one that most could not live and would probably have died long before you hit your worse. Your legacy is one of strength. You were a woman who could endure a tremendous amount of physical and mental pain, yet some way manage to raise to well adjusted children. You were a woman who a great sense of gratitude in your heart and shared that with others. You were a HIGHLY intelligent woman who most certainly would have done many other things if mental illness did not rob your of your full potential. You taught me that whining and complaining about is life is USELESS. I rarely witness you doing that. 

Thank you Mom for being the best mother EVER! It is because of you I am a woman of strength and one that sees the possibilities in life. I will continue to share your STORY till we meet again. 

The Day After.......Remembering the Lost (A Tribute to Mother)

The lost of a love one changes us. The day after, the month after, the year after, the decade after and so on. Often in the immediate days following a loss we try to understand why it occurred. We blame ourselves, the doctors, and even our love ones for their death. Anger and sadness consumes us and we often feel a sensation of drowning without hope of recovery. 

But we will and must recover from our losses of those we love. For they want us to us. I know in my heart my mother wanted me the moments after her death to two things: fulfill her wishes, live on, and share her legacy. Although in the end we were not entirely able to grant her wish of having an autopsy and have her body donated to science for research (you can not donate and have an autopsy, too). We opted for a donation to science research. As a result, a group of medical researchers or students were able to study the effects of illness on the heart and how it affected our skeletal system. 

The greatest lesson I have learned every day since that November day was that our death's are often meant to be. Whether it is to end chronic pain and illness in the case of my mother or to grant extended life to another through organ donation (someone provided that for my mother years before her death). More importantly, we must not be compelled to cry every day. Our love ones would not want that for us. They would want us to live on. 

For those who are young in the game: Remember the loss of parent will leave an empty space that may never be filled, but the days, nights, weeks, and years will get better as we move through the stages of grief. 

The greatest gift we can give our departed parent is to live our life out fully and share the legacy with others.